(2004)
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+++++about
He asked me if I know Yugoslavia. I said, "Yes. A country that suffered from war, too. In the 90's." Yugoslavia was one of the socialist countries.
He said Yugoslavian are Iraqi's friends, which I don't quite understand. Later when I asked if they had a lot of products made in China when he was in Iraq. He explained that when he lived in the south of Iraq, there are three groups of people that they like to do business with--"First, Yugoslavians. Second, Indians. Third, Chinese."
He asked me if I'm married and if I can go to China to get married and come back with my wife. I said no and avoided that question. I don't come out to people unless I think we are close enough. I think it's problematic because sometimes if I don't come out to people I know, we don't get closer. Also, because I don't have a boyfriend and have been alone for years, often I don't feel excited to talk about my story.
Then I asked him in his culture if he is allowed to marry more than one woman. He said they are allowed to marry a maximum of four women. He stressed that the husband should treat all his women equally. He gave me an example, which I don't remember exactly. It seems that if the husband kisses one of his wives one time, he has to kiss each of the other three one time. Otherwise they would get really unhappy and want a divorce.
He said nobody wants to marry four women because it is almost impossible to be fair to all four women. I didn't believe that Iraqi men didn't take advantage of polygamy so I pushed further: "How about two, Do you have friends who have two?" He admitted there were a few.
He then added: "If you sleep with other women, you should get a divorce." I was surprised when he said American women were bad because "if you have an American girlfriend, she don't just sleep with you, she sleeps with ten other guys." It also reminded me that he praised Chinese women, saying that they respected their body.
